Lyrics to Maxwell's Silver Hammer written by Paul McCartney and John Lennon

Joan was quizzical; Studied pataphysical

Science in the home.

Late nights all alone with a test tube.

Oh, oh, oh, oh.

Maxwell Edison, majoring in medicine,

Calls her on the phone.

"Can I take you out to the pictures,

Joa, oa, oa, oan?"

But as she's getting ready to go,

A knock comes on the door.

Bang! Bang! Maxwell's silver hammer

Came down upon her head.

Clang! Clang! Maxwell's silver hammer

Made sure that she was dead.

Back in school again Maxwell plays the fool again.

Teacher gets annoyed.

Wishing to avoid an unpleasant

Sce, e, e, ene,

She tells Max to stay when the class has gone away,

So he waits behind

Writing fifty times "I must not be

So, o, o, o.."

But when she turns her back on the boy,

He creeps up from behind.

Bang! Bang! Maxwell's silver hammer

Came down upon her head.

Clang! Clang! Maxwell's silver hammer

Made sure that She was dead.

P. C. Thirty-one said, "We've caught a dirty one."

Maxwell stands alone

Painting testimonial pictures.

Oh, oh, oh, oh.

Rose and Valerie, screaming from the gallery

Say he must go free

(Maxwell must go free)

The judge does not agree and he tells them

So, o, o, o.

But as the words are leaving his lips,

A noise comes from behind.

Bang! Bang! Maxwell's silver hammer

Came down upon his head.

Clang! Clang! Maxwell's silver hammer

Made sure that he was dead.

Silver Hammer Ma, a, an.

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WONDER IF THIS WOULD WORK ON THE CROOKS? :)