Born To Be Miserable

Saturday, May 19, 2012

Bullies, Crime, and Resiliency by Kimberly Koerber-Bauer-Koerber


I can relate to the below posts on Yahoo and poem from  a survivor about bullying.  As people get older, the abuse gets worse, and the only thing to do is to become more resiliant.  I can recall wearing socks to school as a kid with holes in them because I was broke and had no other socks to wear and getting beaten up by my mother who had 'issues' at the time.  The thing is that I discovered that the crooks, later in my life, were the perpetrators of bullying.  Crooks and Crime and Ethics, again.


                                                                               Kimberly! :)



A woman who was bullied mercilessly in high school 25 years ago has gotten some closure from a class reunion page on Facebook.
Lynda Frederick, a graduate of Orange Glen High in Escondido, Calif., in 1987, posted a heartbreaking poem about her experience on her school's 25th class reunion page.
that little girl who came to school with the clothes she wore the day before
instead of asking why.. you picked on her...
the little girl who had bruises and was dirty
instead of asking why.. you picked on her
that little girl was me...
that little girl had love in her heart to share with all but no one wanted it...
this WOMEN has grown up now
however the little girl inside still crys
because her childhood was shattered
The post resulted in an outpouring of support and regret from former classmates.
"This poem touched me so bad I could not sleep. I cried," Lisa Wallace told NBC San Diego. Wallace and many others contacted Frederick to apologize for those years. They've created a scholarship fund in her name and raised money to fly Frederick to the reunion, and she has agreed to go.
Frederick says she has forgiven her classmates.

Former classmate Kristi Malone remembers the bullying incidents but felt powerless to stop them. "I felt so bad for her. But never thinking in my head that I could stand up for her," she told NBC.
Frederick says she had a troubled home life and graduated a semester early, moving across the country to Seneca Falls, N.Y. She now has three children of her own, including a 14-year-old daughter who is now dealing with bullies at school.
"I tell her to look at the people and say, 'Listen,'" says Frederick. "'If you don't like what I'm wearing, if you don't like the way I look—don't look!'"


      GW12 hrs ago
      Today, the idiot school administrators would have you arrested for defending yourself. And, they wonder why the problem is so prevalent.
    HARRY18 hrs ago
    There was one guy from school who was bullied because he was small. People called him Josie instead of Joe. I remember seeing the picture in the paper of him receiving the Silver Star for bravery in action and the Purple Heart in Vietnam. I've often wondered how the a-holes who messed with him all the time felt when they saw it. Most of them had gotten college deferments or joined the National Guard and stayed home. I talked to him a couple of times after he returned. He went to college and became a high school teacher in another town.
    • Met Fan Lou
      Met Fan Lou18 hrs ago
      Joe the HERO won in the end-God Bless him and thanks for his service. I am a 'Nam vet too and to get the Silver Star he had to save his buddies' lives. Way to go Joe!
    • DeputyDawg
      DeputyDawg17 hrs ago
      Thanks for your service, Met.
    • howard
      howard15 hrs ago
      @Met.Glad to see that I am not the only Vietnam vet on this board tonight.Welcome home brother.
  • Boppity
    Boppity19 hrs ago
    Everyone thinks bullies are victims themselves and must come from horribly tragic abusive homes, but the biggest bullies I knew were the rich, popular in-crowd kids. Sports jocks and cheerleaders and country club brats. The kind of kids the adults just LOVED were the crulest and most hurtful to outcasts and those who did not fit in.
    • Suzi
      Suzi18 hrs ago
      I agree. The bullies at my school were the rich popular in crowd kids. The teachers all loved them and would never believe they were bullies. In fact, there were students in the middle school who were outcasts and themselves bullied then in high school they became jocks and became bullies.
    • Mimi
      Mimi17 hrs ago
      And guess what? They never grow out of their delusion of superiority. They are the ones who, typically, end up as part of the 1% or at the least running some major corporation.
    • Boppity
      Boppity17 hrs ago
      I've always said it takes a real jerk to want to be a "leader".
  • hmmmmmmm
    hmmmmmmm18 hrs ago
    In HS i remember a boy being picked on and physicaly abused by others every day. He was a quiet, shy yet smart kid. I once stood up for him in gym. By graduation, I decided got to know him better. The last week of HS we actualy walked home together, his mom had asked me to stop in for a while, so I did. When I walked into his room, he had trophies and photos of himself in fighting national martial arts competitions. I may amazement, he was a championship 2nd degree black belt like his dad. Till today, I just cant understand why he held back on those cowards. I hear he now owns a few dozen martial arts franchizes and is a stunt guy for big time celebrities. Just something for all those bullies to eat.
    • Kathi
      Kathi18 hrs ago
      Awesome...what a great story....Love the fact that you stood up and befreinded him....great lesson to anyone who is on either side of the problem
    • Roze
      Roze11 hrs ago
      This is a cool post...
    • hello n
      hello n4 hrs ago
      martial artists are always taught to never fight back unless you really have to, that is why. :)
  • WP
    WP21 hrs ago
    Glad to see one class grow up and own up. I was bullied from 7th to 12th grades at a christian school no less. Bullies don't realize the hurt can last a life time. Forgiven? Yes. Forgotten is another story.
  • Mish
    Mish Charlotte, North Carolina20 hrs ago
    I was bullied. I use to wear the same blue jumpsuit to school everyday and my sneakers were worn thru... It's the price you pay when you end up on welfare because your mother decides she doesn't want someone to beat and cheat on her day in and day out. And then you think that maybe brighter days are ahead when your mom picks up double shifts so she can etch out a better way for you and your siblings... but all that comes of that is her continued absence and the opportunity for you to be molested because there's no one around to see. Yeah... I feel for this woman. I feel for anyone who has ever been bullied in any way, shape or form.
  • TimBrock
    TimBrock Denver, Colorado17 hrs ago
    Anmyone remember being mistreated by others in school. And then the teachers would just say "Ignore them!"
  • joanne
    joanne Tampa, Florida20 hrs ago
    Things you do to others will come back to haunt you someday.
    BRYANN Guatemala City, Guatemala20 hrs ago
    Unfortunately the mental scars never go away. You carry it forever.
  • sk
    sk1 day 2 hrs ago
    mean people suck
  • Whitney
    Whitney20 hrs ago
    You shouldn't make fun of someone's clothes or social awkwardness. I knew a boy from my High School who was made fun of by his peers. He was a poor boy from the projects who couldn't afford new clothes. He didn't get a car for his sixteenth birthday. All of his school supplies were second hand. And people teased him for not being able to afford the things they could. And I thought those people must have been the lowest creatures to ever walk the face of the Earth.
  • Kathy
    Kathy20 hrs ago
    I was bullied. Fat, red hair, turquoise glasses (my mother picked them, and she was one of my bullies through my life). I got over it. I'm 61 now.....still hair has turned to gray, glasses are modest. If you bully me now, I'll laugh at you because you're the one that's pathetic, not me. Bullies are just insecure, unimportant people that need attention. Besides, we're all beautiful in God's eyes! (I can see the thumbs down now.....)
  • m
    m20 hrs ago
    i was bullied by my teachers and other students. i'm half black/half white and was one of the only "minorities" in my school. my teachers told me i was a poor student and would never graduate. other students said i slept around and was pregnant and had std's. everyone (including peers) always chimmed in my race, calling me names and saying "you won't understand." all because i was "different." i never talked to anyone. the rumors wern't true but they still hurt. i dropped out after my sophomore year to become homeschooled. i just turned 17 and now i have a high school diploma and i'm going to college in august. i'm going back to my old school and showing it off to the teacher who said i have no hope in life and am nothing but a screw up ;]
  • yahoo user
    yahoo user21 hrs ago
    I had a crap childhood, i was bullied, BUT I also bullied someone. I feel so bad about it now decades later. I wish i could apologize to the kid that I bullied but could never find him. So John Mons from Michigan, I'm truly sorry. :(
  • nicolina
    nicolina21 hrs ago
    Mean people usually produce little mean people
  • Carole Jones
    Carole Jones21 hrs ago
    Shame on anyone who bullies don't know what they are going through, you don't know what goes on in their homes....try being a friend to someone who is being picked sick and tired of hearing about kids bullying others...parents need to be on top of their kids about this kind of is not acceptable!
  • Melanie
    Melanie21 hrs ago
    I think we the adults need to be the example. I see more bullying in these Comment Sections than I ever saw in all my years in school. The internet breeds ambiguity, and that gives normally nice people free license to be hateful and mean.
  • Kris
    Kris Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania21 hrs ago
    I bullied a mentally challenged boy in grade school. Kept pushing him down a small hill as he tried to climb up. It continued until he began to cry. All of a sudden it hit me how much of a terrible thing I was doing. It made me sick to my stomach. I helped him home and couldn't even sleep that night. I still think of that incident and it sickens me still today. I am 65. I have tried to teach my kids and now my grandkids to treat those less fortunate with respect. That one event changed my life, I believe for the better. I don't see how anyone who bullies someone weaker can find gratification in these acts.
  • backinfulldistrust
    backinfulldistrust21 hrs ago
    For the victims of bullying, there is always hope.
    And life after graduation does get better.

    For the predators, the only hope is repentance
    and atonement. And life after graduation for them
    is a downhill spiral.

No comments:

Episcopal/Anglican Church Shield in blue

Episcopal/Anglican Church Shield in blue
"I have been a member of the Episcopal Church all of my life"

About Me

My photo
Hello! I am a Social Worker (since 1990) and a writer. I am seeking writing jobs, funding for my Writing business called "the Indigo Drum" and a way to run an office again, plus a car.